Unspoken Rules

 Hello everyone! Another week down and another blog post about families!! This week we discussed so many amazing topics (this might be something I say every week so prepare yourself). One topic that really got me thinking was the idea that every family has their own unspoken rules. An unspoken rule is something that parents establish in their family, but never sit down with their children and explain the rule. Growing up I always knew that I couldn’t hang out with friends or go out on Sundays. This rule mainly stemmed from religious beliefs, but I also knew that my parents would enforce it in our home. My friends didn’t have the same rule as my family and would typically invite me over on Sundays. I never asked my parents if I could go because I always knew the answer would be no. When I would get home from school, I had to do my homework before I could go play. My parents established this rule with my brother and I at a young age. In the beginning they would have to remind us to do our homework or ask if we already finish it. As we got older, they didn’t need to ask us those questions anymore because it had become a normal routine. I think it’s so interesting to learn about rules other families have because every family is different. It’s important for parents to create rules within their families that will benefit their specific needs. Something that worked for me growing up might not work for my future family. The past 2 years in college have been an interesting experience as I’ve learned how to live with other people. When I first moved out, I was so surprised to see how different each of my roommates were. My dad was constantly cleaning at home and our house was rarely a mess. Some of my roommates were not always the same way. They would leave dishes in the sink for days, leave the trash in our apartment, and basically never clean up after themselves. It bothered me so much and I was constantly texting my parents to rant about it. My mom helped me realize that each of us were raised differently and taught different rules. I was taught to clean my dishes after I used them and pick up my things each night. My roommates on the other hand were not raised that way. I’m not saying that they were raised wrong, but I think it’s super important to understand our differences. It was easy for me to be frustrated with them but that never solved the problem. When we sat down as an apartment, we were able to create our own set of rules. This can also be effective when getting married or starting a family. As a parent you have all the pressure of raising and supporting your children. On top of that you also have to establish rules that will encourage growth within your family. I’m loving the opportunity I have each week to learn more about families and also reflect on my own family. I strongly believe that each of us are raised in a way that will greatly affect who we are and who we will become. There’s no perfect family and we don’t need to strive for perfection. I hope that one day I have the opportunity to have my own family and that I will be able to recognize the needs of my children and help them reach their potential. Thanks for reading!